Keep Grandma in Prayers
I have been quieter than usual on social media, but today, I have a vulnerable share:
On the evening of December 28th, my Grandmother Barbara Patricia Francis had a stroke. Today emotions have fallen upon me. I have been crying all day. Today it hit me that I didn't get to hear my grandmother's voice as I am so used to talking with her EVERY Saturday and Sunday. This news has placed me in a deeper state of silence.
Our calls have been the thing that has kept me grounded during this ongoing Covid- 19 pandemic rollercoaster, especially with the number of traumatic experiences I have had these past years. We talked about food, her favorite colors, great times in her life with her mother, and some of our family history.
One significant, memorable moment for me was when I asked my grandmother, "Grandma, how did you get through heartbreak?" This year, she taught me how she navigated the hurt and pain of heartbreak.
She responded, "Oh my baby, I know heartbreak... You two didn't work out?... That is okay. What will be, will be!. I know heartbreaks well..." She shared her love stories and heartbreaks while raising three children on her own with me that I don't think I ever knew until this year! As she told me her story, she still was present and aware of me. She was sharing yet listening. She shared and said, "Are you crying... Don't cry cause now you're going to make me cry." So we cried together, and then she closed the call by guiding me to Psalms that helped her get through tough times.
Our last call was last week Sunday during Christmas. I heard strength and joy in her voice. She talked with me about being happy to be back in Jamaica and staying with her brother ( my grand-uncle) and his wife. She had so much joy and bragged about eating fantastic food.
These calls with my grandmother allowed me to hear and see my Grandma in such a different way. Our calls allowed me to put the puzzle pieces of lack of understanding and turn them into compassion, grace, humility, joy, and bask in the art of forgiveness and connection. I can SEE her hurt, pain, resiliency, endurance, Black Girl Magic, joy, abundance, peace, and so much more than her life journey has created.
Today I didn't get to talk with my Grandma due to her stroke, so I uplift her in prayers and ask that all my community keep her in your prayers. She is a fighter. She is pushing through but right now, she cannot talk, but she is trying to. Just yesterday, I got a video update of her trying to move her leg... My prayer is that she recovers with ease and quickly and that the healing of this adjustment allows her to know that she is loved and can lean on us, her family now. I hope she is gentle with herself and does not rush trying to be where she once was. I know this because we are similar in the sense of speeding the healing process to be in a "routine that is familiar."
Thank you in advance for your prayers.